Starri Nite

Roses are red
Violets are blue
Everytime when I think of you
My smile becomes sweet too

You are my sunshine                                                       
I'm attracted by you
When I give you my love                                                                            
Can you love me as I love you

You make me laugh
You make me cry 
But I don't care 
Cause you are my only sky

You are addicting
You are hot 
I wish we could be together
Can I say my love out loud

I send you chocolates
I send you sweets
Why do you smile
Does that mean you accept me

Roses are red 
Violets are blue
You must hear me saying 
I love you

其实这样的冬天也不错.
因为我发现我不会那么想你了.
其实我们都早已经开始了各自的新生活.
只是我一直执著在那个复杂的漩涡.
外面的阳光还是暖暖的.
感觉夏天刚刚还来过.
别再自欺欺人.
秋天都过去了.

暖冬.暖冬.
怎么会有初春的感觉.
发现自己不再那么讨厌冬天了.
它不再是一个天天下雨的季节.
至少目前为止不是.
其实就算是温度低一些.
有温暖的太阳也是可以忍受的吧.

愿我的思念能化作一阵海风.
穿过太平洋到你的身边.
然后轻拂你的脸.

气温骤降.冬天到了.一大堆麻烦也跟着到了.

天天上学要走的很快很快才能不被冻僵.晚上要先开电热毯暖被窝.然后再钻到被窝里.天天晚上写作业抱着一个暖水袋.所以发信息时才不会手指冻的麻木.当然.这些都是小麻烦了.如果还要停留在怕冻感冒冻发烧的阶层.那还是不要继续讨论更头疼的问题了吧.

可是它就是存在的.来了你就要硬着头皮去解决.算了.至少我有人帮我一起解决.反正船到桥头必然直.还是走一步算一步吧.谁愿意这样呢.但是我没有选择了.不是吗.但是妈妈说的对.多一些生活经历是好的.我不能再生活在象牙塔里了.虽然说来到这里等于走出了一层象牙塔.但是我现在面对的是走出更大一个象牙塔.我相信退去了这层象牙塔.我能承受更大的困难和挫折.

你们要相信我的能力!我对自己有信心!你们也要对我有信心!
你所谓的'牺牲'了我其实是对我更好的磨练.
你连那么点小事都不敢放开我让我自己走.以后你还能放得开吗?
我的未来我也有计划.你们可以提供建议.但是不要轻易为我做出决定.

我已经不想去管其他事了.I wana prove myself nd I gota choose my own way.

'不经历风雨.怎能见彩虹'

Well, it is actually not bothering me. The thing that bothers me is you. Can you not put pressure on me by looking me in that way and questioning me in that serious manner. Can you be a person like her. Me and her dicuss things while the stuff you ask me doesn't worth dicussing. That's why sometimes I get annoyed at you. You're worried about things pissing me off. But they are not. The things I'm pissed at are your sighs nd how you think everything is like a large barrier. Well, if you don't think you have da ability 2 solve them out. Then I'll do it. And everytime when we talk we lose our patience. That's another reason I don't like dicussing stuff with you. Why don't you just let me go my own way sometimes. You promised me that I would cook that dish by myself, and later you were like cooking by yourself. What's your problem? You could 've directed me but I was so grumpy cuz u didn't let me do this little whole thing by myself, how could you expect me to do more? You make me feel that I am the reason why you go so hysterious here. Who decided to come here? Not me, but you. Now who is saying he can't stay here anymore? Not me, but you. I don't mind you going back. But please leave me some personal space.

I wish she were here now.

刘蚊子说秋天是最有feel的季节.好吧.我承认.就是有那么一点点的feel了.就是在枫叶随着一阵风飘落的时候有那么一点点feel吧.就是在踩在布满落叶的小路上有那么一点点feel吧.也就是在早上起床看到秋高气爽的晴天有那么一点点feel吧. 

但是.痛恨秋雨.不像春雨那么那么温顺.下一场雨就降温降几度.昨天去看电影时就在雨里哆嗦着等那可恶的公车等了半个钟.痛恨秋天没有网球.痛恨洗碗时刺骨的凉水.每次都要等很久的热水才开始洗碗. 

结论.秋天啊.还真是个矛盾的季节.

今天去Alice的生日会.然后一起看了一部电影.<P.S I love you> 只能说.这部电影给我的震撼太大了.

故事开始于一对争吵的夫妻.Gerry和Holly.两个人在为要不要孩子的事争论不休.然后一幕慢慢平息.退去.转到另一个镜头.

酒吧里的人都穿着黑色的衣服.箱子上面是Gerry的照片.葬礼正在进行.Gerry的死源于一场疾病.Holly陷入了崩溃的边缘.

Holly的30岁生日到了.自从Gerry的葬礼后Holly就将自己困在房子里.一步也不迈出去.她穿在Gerry的衣服.拿着遥控器唱着Gerry喜欢的歌.把Gerry的照片摆了一圈在橱柜上然后中间点了一圈蜡烛.这时房门开了.Holly的妈妈.还有她的朋友Denise和Sharon进来了.她们看到的是到处乱扔的垃圾.堆了一碗池的盘子.还有衣冠不整拿着遥控器唱着歌的Holly.这是一个蛋糕被送到了Holly的家.但是没有任何人知道是从哪里来的.Holly打开蛋糕后发现蛋糕盒背后有个装有磁带的播放机.然后她按下了按钮.
Hey, baby. Surprise.I know this probably feels a little bit morbid. But I just hate the ideathat I'm not gonna be there...to see you freak out over turning 30.I mean, it kills me not to be there.
Heh-heh. That's funny.You're gonna be so impressed.I have a plan, baby. Can you believe it?I've written you letters. Letters that will be coming to you all sorts of ways.I waited till your birthday. I figured you weren't stepping out of the house...for a while. Letter number one will be arriving tomorrow.
Now, you must do what I say, okay?Okay?Don't try to figure out how the letters are coming.It's too brilliant and it'll ruin my plan.Just go along with me on this.Because the thing is,I just can't say goodbye yet.
So for starters... I want you to get dolled up,and just go out and celebrate tonight. Go out with your girlies.I hereby free you from a party with your family, especially your mom.
Oh, man, your mom's there, isn't she?Mm. Shit. Sorry, Patricia.It isn't that I don't love you... but she needs to get a little crazy.So have a slice of the bloody cake...put on your dress and get out of the apartment.
Denise, make a plan. Just leave me with John, okay?
And know that wherever I am,I'm missing you.
Happy birthday.
I love you.
录音机里传来了Gerry的声音.他仿佛知道他死后Holly发生的所有事.天天待在家里.一直很崩溃.他叫Denise她们带着Holly去酒吧里玩.庆祝这个30岁的生日.还说了为了让Holly以后出门.他给她写了信.也做好了所有关于信的安排.当天Holly就被朋友们带出了门去庆祝生日.

Save yourself bruises and buy yourself a bedside lamp. And remember, a disco diva must look her best.
Go buy yourself a knock-out outfit. You'll need it for when my next letter comes.Need it for what?And I know you hate your job,but I'll help.
Look for a sign. You'll know what to do.
P.S. I love you. 
第二封信如期的在第二天到来了.Gerry叫Holly买齐了接下来几天要用的东西.他知道Holly不喜欢她的工作.但是他会帮忙解决这些的.

果然第二天.Holly就被解雇了.Gerry在第三封信里让Holly去酒吧唱歌.Holly在唱歌的时候又回忆起他们一起在酒吧的日子.[Gerry在台上唱歌并且唱歌完在全酒吧人面前打赌Holly不敢上台唱歌.Holly很勇敢的上了台.而且唱了很好.但是不幸的是.她不小心踩到电线跌下了舞台.最后导致躺在了病床上.鼻子摔断了.腿也摔断了.但她后来还是原谅了Gerry.]

My leather jacket is for you.I always loved the way that looked on you. But the rest of my stuff,you don't need it. Make some space in that bloody apartment for yourself. Go on.It's time, baby.
P.S. I love you.
第四封信提醒了Holly他们在酒吧见面时的一个棕色夹克.[Gerry慢慢走下舞台.弹着吉他唱着歌走到了穿着棕色夹克的Holly的身边.酒吧里的人都给他们让了路.然后两个人吻在了一起.]Holly回到了家.按照Gerry的信上说的清理了他的遗物.只留下了那件属于他们两个人的棕色夹克.

然后Gerry给Holly.Denise和Sharon安排了去爱尔兰.Gerry的故乡的旅行.在旅馆里Denise接到了Gerry的第五封信.Gerry叫她带着Holly去酒吧.那个酒吧就是Holly在看第四封信时想到的酒吧.

Sharon也接到了Gerry的第六封信.Gerry在信里面叫Sharon带她们去钓鱼.在钓鱼过程中Holly知道Denise要结婚了.Sharon也怀孕了.Holly很惊讶.也试着表现的很高兴很兴奋.但是她掩饰不了心中的寂寞.

接着第七封信是给Gerry的爸妈的.他叫他们在见到Holly的时候带她去后院看看.

Holly在后院找到了第八封信.
To my Galway Girl:
You're an angel for seeing my folks.I told you my mom didn't hate your guts.Well, you know, anymore. You are now standing in my fort where I did all my big thinking.This is where I stood thinking about you after the very first time we met.
You didn't look real to me at first. I never saw so many colors on one girl before...but you looked like you belonged out there, all right.You and all your colors. Do you remember the first thing you ever said to me?
I'm lost. Oh, you didn't look lost, not to me.
Before long, I couldn't get you to shut up.
But you were so cute, trying to impress me with William Blake and all your grand plans.I had no idea what you were talking about... but I couldn't help loving the way you talked. I didn't have a clue, actually.
I loved you right then and there.
Life had changed as I knew it. And now it's changed again, luv.See, I don't worry about you remembering me... it's that girl on the road you keep forgetting. My business is to create. It doesn't even matter what you do. You told me that, remember.
P.S. I love you
这封信讲述了他们第一次见面的情景.[Holly19岁的时候来到了爱尔兰.Gerry第一眼见到她的时候.Holly五彩缤纷的衣服吸引住了他.她对他说的第一句话是'我迷路了'.但是她看起来很开心.然后他们就一直走啊走.当时Holly满脑子都是奇怪的想法.但是她很明确的说她想要创业.后来Gerry把他的夹克借给了她.她走得时候没有还他.而且也不肯告诉他她的任何信息.她说有缘他们就会再见面的.果然.他们在酒吧里遇见了.]这封信仿佛明确了Holly的目标.她要move on in her life.

Holly的妈妈一直很担心Holly会一直沉寂在这些信当中.但是其实每一封信都让Holly迈了一大步.从爱尔兰回来后.Holly就开始设计鞋子.自己创业了.她不再是那个还沉寂在Gerry的死亡当中的Holly了.

最后一封信.Gerry感觉到他的时间不多了.他叫Holly的妈妈觉得Holly快要解脱了的时候给她.
Dear Holly,
I don't have much time. I don't mean literally, I mean, you're out buying ice cream and you'll be home soon...but I have a feeling this is the last letter. Because there's only one thing left to tell you. It isn't to go down memory lane or make you buy a lamp. You can take care of yourself without any help from me.
It's to tell you how much you move me.How you changed me. You made me a man by loving me, Holly. and for that I am eternally grateful.Literally. If you can promise me anything,promise me that whenever you're sad or unsure or you lose complete faith that you'll try and see yourself through my eyes.Thank you for the honor of being my wife. I'm a man with no regrets.
How lucky am I? You made my life, Holly,but I'm just one chapter in yours.There'll be more. I promise. So here it comes, the big one. Don't be afraid to fall in love again. Watch out for that signal when life as you know it ends.
P.S. I will always love you. 

Gerry用这些信拯救了一个陷入崩溃的Holly.他是世界上最了解她的人了.他能猜到她每一个举动.包括陷入崩溃后的.他说她是他的整个世界.但是他只是她世界的一部分.还有更多更精彩的篇章等着她去谱写.最后.不要害怕再去爱别人活着再去被爱.

每一封信后面都有他亲笔'P.S. I love you.'

上周日夏时制就结束了.又一个夏天离开了.每年都是重复着同样的心情.夏天来时的喜悦.激动还有属于夏天的热情.到夏天离开后的失落.伤心和面对冬天的绝望.为什么我就不能把对待夏天的热情转移一些到冬天去呢?这周四突然大幅度降温.自习的时候突然就冷了下来.然后就是瓢泼大雨.雨季又来了.一场秋雨一场凉啊.这里冬天穿裙子还真是个糟糕的选择.上课有时候感觉膝盖都会隐隐作痛.但是不知道到底是我的心理暗示还是真正的痛.

这周二又做了体育达标的东西.跑完800米后休息了一下又冲刺200米.然后那天下午的感觉又有了.屁股痛到不行.但是这次我不像以前那么没骨气的哼哼唧唧的了.这次我就说了一句.My arse hurts.然后就躺倒草地上了.草地是潮湿的.带有刚下过雨的青草味.然后疼痛就慢慢消失了.我看着倒转着90度的世界.头突然很晕.

放假了.两周的长假.昨天去爸爸一个朋友家吃饭.结果竟然在那里发现了'我和僵尸有个约会'的碟!然后我就无比无比无比的激动.而且是1-3部的.当晚就抱回家看了.=.=.

不知道为什么.最近睡不了懒觉了.天天不到8点就起床.就算前一天晚上是12点睡的.第二天早上依旧睁开眼打开手机后显示的是07:xx.觉得自己丧失了一种享受的权利.想蒙着头再睡两个小时也睡不着了.

嗯.就是这样.秋天来了.

早上去打了网球比赛.虽然赢了.但是没有什么很大的喜悦感.对手实在是太弱了.不像上周.虽然输了.但是还是很高兴的.和比赛质量也有关系吧.不过不管怎么样.周六早上早起去打一场球还是比较有意义的.

最近很喜欢在英语课上看着从教室墙面上很高的窗户照进来的阳光.会看到很多很小的尘埃浮在空气中.所以就形成了一道敞开的有形的光线.这周四的自习课下了我回来后最大的一场雨.开始是黑压压的云.后来就变成了小雨.到中雨.再到暴雨.教室里面找不到灯的开关.所以屋子里的气氛都很压抑.被乌云压得喘不过气来.下完雨后天空放晴了很久.嗯.至少晴天能让我感到夏天还没有离开吧.

刚刚看到一句很有feel的话.'你陪我坐在记忆的墙边'.我又把blog上面所有写过的文章都看了一遍.我也算是又浏览的一遍'记忆的墙'吧.能看到自己一个个细小的心理转变.特别是那些去年来这里后写的日志.从它们身上看到了自己的日渐成熟.只是很可惜.没有人'陪我坐在记忆的墙边'.我想.记忆的墙还是自己在上面涂鸦.然后自己慢慢欣赏吧.

现在不再去上那些补习班.所以感觉比去年闲了很多.所以每天回家后都会抽出一段时间看书或者上网.然后5点开始帮忙做饭.到7点差不多吃完收拾完.然后写写作业.一般10点就能准备睡觉了.一周打三次网球.然后每天睡至少8个小时.这样的生活很好.很平静.我也适应了.不会像去年经常想着回国了.而是想着怎么才能把每一天过得很好.

真的很好.